Just received a heart-warming letter from our cat. Thought I would share it with everyone.
asedfjgksdjfgoiclepgmdflejrgojavlma;jkgjgoerlew[reofdgmfheirhuth...htuR iH oops, I mean Hi Ruth,
This whole typing thing is hard. Don's asleep at the key board so I thought I would take over, otherwise you will probably never get a response from the lazy sleeping bugger. Don't get me wrong, he treats me well, but there just seems to be something missing, where is the love I say. When are you and Gord coming home? I miss the communal bed, playing with Gord at 4:00 a.m., and having him get up in the middle of the night, just for me! Don, well he leaves the window open, although he locked me in on Halloween night, silly bugger... something about saving his testicles from the next canning season if he didn't - I really don't get his oblique references sometimes. I am getting very good at getting up that cat ladder though, on the weekend I impressed Don by leaping from the second step from the top, up to the start of the ladder, and then 3 more leaps up the ladder and in through the window without even touching the window ledge. As you can see from my picture above, there's nothing I like more on a sunny morning than just making myself comfortable on the window ledge while surveying the world.
Well so much for Obama-mania hey, I think if he just kept a presidential cat around his approval ratings would soar. What's with always picking a dog, it didn't help 'Tricky Dick' much, and frankly a dog just appeals to a bunch of white trash voters, they're voting Republican anyway. I say look to where you can capture new untapped voter appeal, the cat lovers, they're the ones not voting, bring them on board. It could even be a budget stimulus item, you know: let's make America rat free, get a cat. They could count cats as family dependants and offer up a family cat tax benefit; America could become the worlds leading cat food producer... jobs,jobs,jobs!
Speaking of getting rid of rats in politics, did you read that our man Gordo resigned. Yep, it's official he bid a tearful farewell at a press conference today, it was a bit of a surprise. He really did make people believe he was going to stay on and fight, even with a personal approval rating of 9%. I mean it was only a few days ago he announced to the province a 15% personal income tax cut, instituted a cabinet shuffle, and sacked Martyn Brown, I really think he was planning on staying on. His press conference seemed hastily organised, quite comical really, the door opened and he almost looked like he was pushed through the door out in front of the cameras, no aids around him, nothing, just stumbling a little toward the podium. His speech had the sound of reading the words with a gun to his head. Turns out there was a secret ballot on leadership review cast by members from across the province, they were going to release the results at the next convention which is in a couple of weeks, hmm do you think he was given a sneak preview of those results?
Hey I see you cats are now into Spain, and looking to sell or give away your bikes ... ya, I follow your blog. Maybe you can trade your bikes for a stay at one of those fancy B & Bs you are staying at. Hey you're not petting any of those foreign cats are you? Stay away from them, you hear, they're just slutty flea bags, carrying all sorts of vermin. Why I wouldn't be surprised if they don't carry bed bugs! Don't touch them you hear?!?
I've got to go now, Don's starting to drool on me, why doesn't he just go to bed?
Russell
P.S. When the spell checker checked the email it didn't recognise Obama, instead it suggested Osama, wonderful!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
asedfjgksdjfgoiclepgmdflejrgojavlma;jkgjgoerlew[reofdgmfheirhuth...htuR iH oops, I mean Hi Ruth,
This whole typing thing is hard. Don's asleep at the key board so I thought I would take over, otherwise you will probably never get a response from the lazy sleeping bugger. Don't get me wrong, he treats me well, but there just seems to be something missing, where is the love I say. When are you and Gord coming home? I miss the communal bed, playing with Gord at 4:00 a.m., and having him get up in the middle of the night, just for me! Don, well he leaves the window open, although he locked me in on Halloween night, silly bugger... something about saving his testicles from the next canning season if he didn't - I really don't get his oblique references sometimes. I am getting very good at getting up that cat ladder though, on the weekend I impressed Don by leaping from the second step from the top, up to the start of the ladder, and then 3 more leaps up the ladder and in through the window without even touching the window ledge. As you can see from my picture above, there's nothing I like more on a sunny morning than just making myself comfortable on the window ledge while surveying the world.
Well so much for Obama-mania hey, I think if he just kept a presidential cat around his approval ratings would soar. What's with always picking a dog, it didn't help 'Tricky Dick' much, and frankly a dog just appeals to a bunch of white trash voters, they're voting Republican anyway. I say look to where you can capture new untapped voter appeal, the cat lovers, they're the ones not voting, bring them on board. It could even be a budget stimulus item, you know: let's make America rat free, get a cat. They could count cats as family dependants and offer up a family cat tax benefit; America could become the worlds leading cat food producer... jobs,jobs,jobs!
Speaking of getting rid of rats in politics, did you read that our man Gordo resigned. Yep, it's official he bid a tearful farewell at a press conference today, it was a bit of a surprise. He really did make people believe he was going to stay on and fight, even with a personal approval rating of 9%. I mean it was only a few days ago he announced to the province a 15% personal income tax cut, instituted a cabinet shuffle, and sacked Martyn Brown, I really think he was planning on staying on. His press conference seemed hastily organised, quite comical really, the door opened and he almost looked like he was pushed through the door out in front of the cameras, no aids around him, nothing, just stumbling a little toward the podium. His speech had the sound of reading the words with a gun to his head. Turns out there was a secret ballot on leadership review cast by members from across the province, they were going to release the results at the next convention which is in a couple of weeks, hmm do you think he was given a sneak preview of those results?
Hey I see you cats are now into Spain, and looking to sell or give away your bikes ... ya, I follow your blog. Maybe you can trade your bikes for a stay at one of those fancy B & Bs you are staying at. Hey you're not petting any of those foreign cats are you? Stay away from them, you hear, they're just slutty flea bags, carrying all sorts of vermin. Why I wouldn't be surprised if they don't carry bed bugs! Don't touch them you hear?!?
I've got to go now, Don's starting to drool on me, why doesn't he just go to bed?
Russell
P.S. When the spell checker checked the email it didn't recognise Obama, instead it suggested Osama, wonderful!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Location:Figueres
No comments:
Post a Comment